As a girl, it’s not right to put myself out there
People keep speculating about my personal life because I am evasive about it. When there’s an announcement worth making, I will talk. I don’t like being under the microscope constantly and having to explain myself, being subjected to that sort of judgment. Speculation is part of my business. I’m used to it – not that I like it, I hate it.
It upsets me, but I don’t think it’s right to put myself out there, especially as a girl. Maybe if I were a man, I would have been a philandering Casanova. As a girl, I am this stupid, emotional, very loyal, sort of believe-in-values-and-principals sort of girl. It’s very irritating. And I’m a Cancerian. We’re kind of like that.
It’s not fair for people to judge and decide the good, bad and ugly, and say, ‘Oh, she looks nice with him; oh she shouldn’t have done that’. I don’t come into your bedroom and ask you what you did last night. I understand that we’re celebrities, but we’re also human beings.
A little bit of yourself is important to keep to yourself. Like I tweet the things I want people to know. People know what I want them to know. And even if I come out and clear everything, people will speculate further on what I said and why I said it.
There are cliques in Bollywood, but I am not a part of them
I have lived my life on my terms. I have never had issues with anybody in the industry, so I don’t know if it’s sorted or not, or if there was an issue to begin with. Of course, there are cliques in Bollywood and people stick together, but I have always tried to stick to my work.
As an industry, Bollywood is very competitive, and I’m very competitive as a person, but I’ve never been a part of any clique, and I’ve always worked with all actors and directors, all camps. It’s not been easy. I never had anybody backing me.
I have been thrown out of films for reasons unknown to me, I have been cast in films for reasons unknown to me. I think it’s destiny and hard work. I don’t cry about my losses.
On my thirteenth birthday, when I was about to enter my teens and wanted to go to America to study, my mom asked me if I was sure about it, and I just kept saying that I want to go. So, she said, ‘OK, whatever you do, it’ll be your decision.
If something goes wrong, I’ll take you back, but you’ll know that there will be consequences of your actions and you should have the courage to stand up for them’. I live my life extremely by that rule. I am very high headed – that doesn’t mean arrogant – but I believe in conducting yourself with dignity in whatever choices you make, and that is important, and a big piece of how I am, where I am.
I mean, my parents are doctors, we’d never even been to Mumbai. I had to learn grooming, makeup, acting, everything on my own. I take pride in that.
It’s possible for two lead actresses to be friends
I am professionally friendly with everyone, and along the years, I have made some amazing friends. I am just in a very content place right now. It’s not a happy place, it’s a content place.
And I definitely think it is possible for two lead actresses to be friends, especially if you are in a content place. Of course, there will be insecurities as an actor.
You always want to strive to be your best, but your career doesn’t depend on other people. It depends on your choices.
Even if my films haven’t done well, I’ve always got appreciation. I have got awards for films that haven’t done well, and that makes me feel comfortable with who I am. Hence, you can be friends with whoever, and it doesn’t matter.
You can be genuinely happy for other people, but first, you have to be happy with yourself.
I didn’t have time to think about what being a celebrity meant
I wasn’t even prepared to be an actress. I was 17 when I came out of high school, and suddenly became Miss World and then I became an actress. I didn’t have time to think that ‘oh this is what celebrityhood does’.
Thank God, I had my mom to slap me in my face and ask me to calm down. When I suddenly became famous, I didn’t know what was going on. I was like a zombie robot.
Thankfully, I was a little quick-witted, so I could deal with the world media and have an opinion on the economic crisis of Zambia or something.
I knew how to wing it at that time, but it took me a while to get on my feet and understand who I am. My parents told me, ‘you’ll be back to college in two minutes if you let this get to your head’.
It’s not fair to only think of the 100 crore club as successful
Ever since the first 100 crore thing happened, it’s like people follow the Pied Piper and everybody wants to talk about only the 100 crore club.
Why can’t we talk about films that have not had a 100 crore budget and have been hugely successful? Films, which in terms of ratio, have been more successful than a 100 crore film would have been – “Kahaani”, “Vicky Donor”, “The Dirty Picture”.
I don’t think you have a hit film only if you’re in the 100 crore club. Of course, the more the money, it’s fantastic. I am lucky to have two of them, but I don’t think it’s fair to say, ‘oh only if I have a 100 crore film will I be a success’.
I mean, Vidya Balan is the most successful heroine of all of us, and I think it’s because of the fact that she has done incredible movies and the films have made so much money.
I am a huge Vidya fan because of her courage and the credibility with which she does things.
Professional Singing is a risk
I never even thought about singing professionally, but then, this opportunity of the album came. I’ve always loved singing. My dad sings. And when this idea came up, it seemed interesting.
I thought it’d be pushing the envelope, taking a risk. It’s important to remain within convention and yet tear at its seams. For instance, I am doing a pop album, which will be conventional and it’ll have music that people will love.
It’s not some acoustic-guitar-poetry-niche thing. It’s commercial and conventional in that sense, but you will see me tearing at it since I am an actor.
I think the only other person who has done that is Jennifer Lopez. I am not saying I will be the next pop icon or whatever, but I always aim for the best. It should be fun.
I don’t know if I’ll ever sing in films, because I never plan my life. I always feel like I make plans, and then God laughs at me and says, ‘uh uh, that will never happen’, so now I just don’t do it.
source : here